Go Fug Yourself: Because Fugly Is The New Pretty

Fugs and Pieces, Thanksgiving Edition: Wednesday, November 25

Fug file:

poultry as a hat

Every Thanksgiving, one of the things I'm grateful for is the opportunity to use this photo. Here at GFY HQ, we wish all our American readers a very happy and healthy holiday, and our non-American readers a very delightful Thursday-Sunday, because we are taking the traditional four-day weekend to recharge our fug batteries (and eat more than we ought). We will be back with fresh material and new posts on Monday, November 30. Until then, please enjoy these selections from all over the interwebs, and, as always, be excellent to each other.

-- This pic of Gabby Sidibe hanging out with Joan Collins basically just makes me happy. I want the two of them to pair up for a buddy cop comedy and run around and be awesome together. (Dlisted)

-- I just want to know how Jimmy Fallon discovered he could impersonate Neil Young singing Will Smith's "Fresh Prince of Bel Air." Like, how did that happen? (Gothamist)

-- I can't imagine when else I would have the opportunity to link to a website featuring, in its own words, "eclectic and rare book illustrations," other than now, when it features a post about a family called, yes, The Fuggers. Thank goodness the opportunity arrived, because it is a fascinating site and you may waste hours there. (BibliOdyssey)

-- On the other side of the intellectual coin, I'm proud to say I aced this "The Many Hats of George Costanza" quiz. I'm coming for you, Independent George! (Mental Floss)

-- This four-day weekend means SHOPPING. Lucky Magazine put together a great list of online Black Friday deals. (Lucky)

-- You've probably seen this already, but pictures of Katie Couric dirty dancing are NEVER not funny. (Gawker)

-- As a kid, I was inordinately obsessed with pop-up books. The dude who was responsible for their resurgence in the United States recently died. Here are ten awesome pop-up books, in his honor. (Flavorwire)

-- Talk about having a type. This woman romanced not one, but TWO of her doormen. Now she's suing her co-op. Apparently, her packages aren't arriving. There's a dirty joke in there somewhere.... (NY Daily News)

-- I can TOTALLY believe Miley Cyrus pulled out the old, "Don't you know who I am?" What delights me, however, is the recipient's reaction. (Lainey Gossip)

-- OH MY GOD. Twilight branding is officially OUT OF CONTROL: cops on Long Island found BAGS OF HEROIN WITH FREAKING EDWARD'S FACE ON THEM. (Cityfile)

-- You need to friend Courtney Love on Facebook RIGHT NOW. Seriously. Go, and come back. I'll wait. Apparently she's dishing about everyone in her status updates. For example, she claims Ed Norton lost $300,000 of her dollars. (Movieline)

-- And finally. You may have seen this already. But in case you haven't, you must. Because it is the best thing that ever happened. Ever. It's Muppets. Singing "Bohemian Rhapsody." Did I clap with glee when Miss Piggy appeared? OH YES I DID. WATCH IT. And have an amazing weekend. (Via Great White Snark)

Zoe Salfug

Fug file:

British TV presenter and Lady About Town Zoe Salmon looks very...

Hmm. Look at that. I'm at a loss for words. Let's just say that if she were about to appear in a editorial spread called The World's Most Extreme Salute to Carmen Miranda By Way of Extravagant Lingerie, With A Splash of the Islands, she would clearly be its star. Otherwise...um, cute bra?

Fughanna

Fug file:

scrolldown fug

It's so nice to see Rihanna so cheerful. And won't lie that it makes my day job so much easier when she's in a good enough mood to play with fashion. For instance:

[Photo: WENN.com]

Houndstooth bags are how GLAMOROUS people keep their ankles warm in winter. As a bonus, they also work as high-fashion cozies for, say, a bottle of rum. In fact, you could keep a whole minibar in those things even as you're wearing them. Those tiny travel-sized bottles of scotch can get so cumbersome in a handbag.

RiRi recently admitted she wanted to name her new album Such A F***ing Lady, but record stores wouldn't allow it, so she switched it up to Rated R. I think she dress she wore to the release party would've worked for either:

Continue reading Fughanna.

Fug the Ad: Avril Lavigne

Wow. If I were the head honcho at T-Mobile, I would be about ready to race down to my ad agency and set it on fire. First, they unleashed those unbearable "if you want to be me, be me // and if you want to be you, be yoooou" television spots, which, after the first 600 times I saw them during the baseball playoffs and World Series, I grew to hate with such a fiery and unquenchable passion that I actually injured myself in a mad dash for the remote so that I could mute one, so sure was I that if I had to listen to that song while watching Dana Carvey and Whoopi Goldberg mug with a phone, I would KILL SOMEONE. And then, there's not Maude, but THIS. Oh, T-Mobile ad featuring Avril Lavigne, how do I hate thee? Let me count the ways:

Avril is a 25 year old divorcee. Is it not time for her to stop dressing like a 16 year old Hot Topic employee?
Like, WHAT IS THAT BOW? EVOLVE, AVRIL.
I'd also love to know why her posture implies that someone who hates those television ads finally snapped and broke her neck.
Seriously, are there still people who really love Avril Lavigne and want to buy things she has endorsed? I imagine old people, like me, are over her, and young people surely think she's lame. Even if some of her songs are secretly a little catchy.
Speaking of, I'm relieved to be able to air this in a public forum: How shitty are Avril's friends, as portrayed in her seminal work, "Sk8tr Boi?" According to the song, this dude they all went to school with, and on whom Avril had a secret forbidden crush, turned into a rock star. And she discovers -- whilst home alone with her baby -- that he's having a local concert. So she calls her friends, and, I quote, "They already know. They've got tickets to see his show." WTF! Why didn't any of these so-called friends call her and say, "Dude, Frank (or whoever) is like a ROCK STAR now! Isn't that crazy? He's playing here Friday night -- do you want to come?" Instead, they're all going out to party and leaving her at home alone! It's mean. I think Avril's biggest problem herein is not that she lost her rock star high school crush, but that her friends blow. Also, I just realized that the person in that song to whom that happens is not Avril, but some other girl, and Avril is rubbing it in that she's dating Frank the High School Rocker now. Avril, that girl doesn't have any friends and you got the guy, so maybe stop gloating.
Okay, I feel better now. Thanks.

Fug or Fab: Jenna Fischer

Fug file:

Confession time: I do not watch The Office. Heather does, so we're not total philistines over here, but for whatever reason it just doesn't grab me. I don't know why. Regardless, I have been given to understand that people are all into that cute John Krasinski and Jenna Fischer here:

SO CLOSE. I actually kind of dig this, but the dress + the beehive (even though y'all know I love me some big hair) + the pale lip is almost a little too costumey for me. But what do I know? I am just SLOWING DYING WHILE WAITING FOR THIS FOUR-DAY WEEKEND TO BEGIN OH MY GOD WHY ISN'T IT THE FOUR-DAY WEEKEND YET I WANT TO DIE.

poll by twiigs.com

Fugmerican Ifugl

Fug file:

Much like the song Kara DioGuardi wrote for this season's American Idol winner, her outfit isn't very good:

I'm sure if GFY had a panel of judges, Randy Jackson would mutter something about how she did her thing, Kara herself would praise her own artistry (presumably for making her necklace out of a tree stump), dearly departed Paula would squeak something about unicorns and Simon would lean back in his chair and pronounce this dreadful. And I always agree with Simon.

On the other hand, at least she can -- presumably -- breathe/walk in this. Unlike other persons who hail from the once and future land of AI:

Continue reading Fugmerican Ifugl.

The Fugly Bones

Fug file:

grey

Between an Oscar nod for Atonement and buzz for her role in The Lovely Bones, Saoirse Ronan has quite the resume considering she hasn't done that much else. And while I appreciate that what she was going for here is at least interesting...

... I am concerned that her next project is The Bonecracker Suite, a balletic ode to the carnal glories of being in traction.

Fug The Cover: Rachael Ray

My first reaction to seeing this magazine was to reach out and try and wipe Rach's hair with my hand.

I know it's supposed to be seasonal snow, or whatever, but... seriously? You're telling me that in the entire process of conceiving of, shooting, selecting, proofing, and publishing this cover, NOBODY thought to say, "Is it just me, or does the 'snow' on her hair actually look like raging dandruff?" Apparently one of the five things every cook needs is a bottle of Selsun Blue and a more sympathetic photo editor.

Unfug It Up: Ashley Greene

Fug file:

Rumor has it Ashley Greene loves her some stripes:

She also, it seems, loves her some ill-fitting pants. Honey, when the waistband is strained thusly, it's in your best interest to have A Clothing Professional nip over and move the inside button just a wee. Or put a belt over it. Or untuck your shirt. I myself have a waist that is a bit wide in proportion to the rest of me, so I know the deep pain that occurs when your ass needs one size, and your waist could use a bit of breathing room. We have tricks! Learn them, my pet!

I shall speak not of the crotch issues.

But let us all speak of how to fix this thing, shall we? (If, in fact, it needs fixing, in your opinion.) Me? I'd set those pants on fire and put her in jeans. Wouldn't that be cute? Put on your Rachel Zoe caftans and fur vests and please style Little Miss Twilight beautiful:

Freaky Fug Tuesday: Winner!

Wow, it was a close vote this week -- if you haven't been going to the poll, you should, because it was TIGHT. The lead changed about three times, with three different entries, but in the end BrokeHedonist won the day with an entry to the tune of "The Dreidel Song." Enjoy:

[Photo: Splash News]

"You had a little yorkie;

A hat was on his head,
Which, though made him look dorky,
Matched your Nice n' Easy red.

Just take the early 90's,
Ad Go-Go, and in swirl,
Dionne from "Clueless"; garnish
with an Austin Powers girl.

Gold boots, belt, dog, and sequins,
With doilies on your thighs,
Can't hope to overpower
All the crazy in your eyes.

Oh, Phoebe, Phoebe, Phoebe
In trompe l'oeil brocade,
You wouldn't even notice
If it rained on your parade."

-- By BrokeHedonist

Thanks again -- these entries have been so consistently good, I'm actually sad that we're not going to do one this week. I know, I know, BOO. But it's Thanksgiving here in the U.S. of A., and we both have family coming into town and wine to drink and turkeys to cook and vegetables to consider serving and then dismiss if they're not in the "potato" family and there are babies and mothers and SO MUCH FOOTBALL and, well, we really don't take that many holiday weekends, so we're seizing this one. But look for another Freaky Fug Friday contest on Friday, December 4. If you haven't been entering, why not? Give it a whirl ! You can do it as many times as you like, and we have nothing but love for all the stuff people have been writing. Can't wait for another go-round.

Fugs and Pieces, Thanksgiving Edition: Wednesday, November 25

Fug file:

Zoe Salfug

Fug file:

VIDEO: Joe Jonas Works Off Some Sexual Frustr

Fughanna

Fug file:

Fug the Ad: Avril Lavigne

Fug or Fab: Jenna Fischer

Fug file:

Fugmerican Ifugl

Fug file:

The Fugly Bones

Fug file:

Fug The Cover: Rachael Ray

Unfug It Up: Ashley Greene

Fug file:

Freaky Fug Tuesday: Winner!

Search

Fug Favorites

Featured Fugger

The Book of fug

Subscribe to GFY

Featured Brands

Featured Searches