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October 29, 2009

Fug or Fab: Demi Moore

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bows

ASHTON KUTCHER: Sorry I ran you over with the car, babe.

DEMI MOORE: No worries. It was an accident.

ASHTON: But your dress got all dirty.

DEMI: Eh, let's just pretend it's supposed to look like that.

ASHTON: God, you're smart.

poll by twiigs.com

October 19, 2009

Well Played, Helen Mirren

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Hello, Helen Mirren.

You're awesome.

That's all.

Love,

Jessica

September 22, 2009

Emmy Awards Fug Carpet: Mary-Louise Parker

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So, I stopped watching Weeds right around when Nancy Botwin decided it would be a good idea to traipse around Tijuana dressed like a prostitute. I mean, Mary-Louise Parker has a great body and all, but when you're smuggling illegal drugs across the Mexican/US border, maybe you ought to consider looking a bit less conspicuous.

However, I'm beginning to wonder if an excessive attachment to whipping out the gams is a Nancy Botwin affectation, or if it's a trait of Mary-Louise Parker's that has bled from fact into fiction. Behold:

This dress is cute. I like it. She's in great shape (she's 45! She looks ten years younger -- thanks perhaps to Botox, in part, but still!). This could totally work...for a cocktail party. Or a movie premiere. And even then, perhaps it would be better on someone very young, like Vanessa Hudgens young, because it smells a bit cutesy for me with the bow. For the Emmys? On a grown-ass woman? REALLY? I don't think so.

September 22, 2009

Emmy Awards Unfug It Up: Jessica Lowndes

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I can't remember what 90210's Jessica Lowndes's hair looked like back when I was watching that show the first time -- I stopped watching, and then EW said it was entertaining again and I picked it back up, and it IS kind of more entertaining now -- but regardless, she has been looking very pretty indeed lately. But let's talk about this outfit:

I feel like it's CLOSE to good and yet not quite there. I kind of almost wish it was a weeeeee bit shorter, or that she'd paired different shoes with it. Something about the dress's length, plus the straps of the shoes feels a teensy bit off for me. I might make the dress itself closer to knee-length, and give her more traditional looking shoes -- you know, with the thought being that if you're going to drift toward a sort of 50s prom look, you might as well just REALLY GO THERE. I mean, not in a costume-y way, but...COMMIT. COMMIT, LADIES!

But what would you do, readers? I feel that this needs some tweaking in order to shut it down, so that we can all die/go bananas, a la Rachel Zoe. Please enlighten us! (Nicely, as usual.)

August 27, 2009

Fug or Fab: Olivia Palermo

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I truly am so torn:

I feel like I OUGHT to hate it, but I love stripes and there's something about it that's so charmingly gamine, even in a way that's bordering on stereotypical, like she considered tossing a beret on her head and a baguette in her pocket. It's hot, and my neighborhood seems like it's about twenty minutes away from bursting into flames (that's summer in Los Angeles for you), so it's entirely possible that my brain has simmered into thoughtless mush in my skull, but I think I like this in spite of myself. Kind of like how I feel about Real Housewives, which is where I fully expect to see Olivia come the 2014 premiere of Real Housewives: Upper East Side.

poll by twiigs.com

August 4, 2009

The United States of Fug

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bows,
red

So, I feel like, from the neck up, the knees down, and the shoulders on, Toni Collette looks FABULOUS!

Unfortunately, the rest of her appears to be going to my prom. Which was in 199noneofyourbusiness. Okay, FINE. IT WAS IN 1993. And THIS is EXACTLY what we all wore. All she needs is an awesome velvet choker, a four-pack of Boone's Farm Strawberry Hill wine coolers and a Pearl Jam CD and she would totally fit right in.

May 29, 2009

The Fugly

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I feel like Ms Whitney Port here, by virtue of being very young and tall and lanky, is one of the few people on earth who can kind of truly pull off these jeans:

Like, I get them. I still think they look like the jeans I wear to garden in, and that -- at best -- they're really too casual for anything other than daytime running around town, but I GET IT. We're all wearing our fat jeans out and about right now and that's okay. It's temporary. In fact, my theory is that this is a natural next step from how we all started wearing big floaty tops and dresses a few years ago and haven't entirely stopped: it's because we all realized that wearing something that didn't require sucking in our stomachs constantly was DELIGHTFUL. I guarantee, in fact, that I am going to get a pair very much like these at some point -- because I am sadly prone to following jeans trends, with the exception of the high-waisted, because I am not totally out of my mind -- and that there will then be a point where I am wearing them and I catch sight of myself in a mirror out at the market or whatever and I think to myself, "JESUS CHRIST THESE JEANS ADD TEN POUNDS TO ME WHAT AM I DOING?" but then I'll be out and about and stuck in them for at least the next hour and then we'll all be filled with pants-related-regret. I'll let you know when that happens. But this is not about her jeans, contrary to what you might have anticipated after reading all that. It is not about her matchy-matchy black-and-white color scheme. It is about her freaking headband. It looks like a spitball on her head. Stop the headband madness, girls. None of us are Blair Waldorf.

February 5, 2009

Fug or Fab: Fergie

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First of all, we'd like to extend a public statement to Fergie: Girl, we did not think you and Duhamel would actually end up actually getting actually married. Surely you can understand this. It seemed like you were engaged forever! In Hollywood, that totally means things are fizzling out and you haven't decided how to break it to your publicist yet. But you two crazy kids managed to pull it out, and he's HOT and seems like a nice dude (I loved him on AMC). So, way to go. We hope you two lovebirds make it. Now, let's talk about your outfit:

From what I can understand, you were not attending a party at which the dress code was "Lacy Flapper." However, you look kind of cute as the aforementioned lacy flapper, although I hate the bow. And it's rather short. Although you have nice stems, as they say in Clueless. But the whole thing is kind of corny. But if a girl can't...oh FORGET IT. I can't decide.

poll by twiigs.com

Results tagged “bows” from GoFugYourself

Fug or Fab: Demi Moore

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Well Played, Helen Mirren

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Emmy Awards Fug Carpet: Mary-Louise Parker

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Emmy Awards Unfug It Up: Jessica Lowndes

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Fug or Fab: Olivia Palermo

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The United States of Fug

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The Fugly

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Fug or Fab: Fergie

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