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October 1, 2009

Fugged to Death

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dreary,
dumpy sacks

Cheer up, Olivia Thirlby!

I totally remember my mother wearing this back when I was a little girl,* and it didn't seem to do her any lasting harm. YOU'RE GOING TO BE OKAY.

*I have just received an email from my mother in which she claims she never would have worn such a thing and I must be thinking of someone else. I HEREBY RETRACT THIS STATEMENT IN THE NAME OF FAMILY HARMONY.

June 16, 2009

Gossip Fug/Well Played, Blake Lively

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TELEGRAMS FROM THE DESK OF JESSICA MORGAN
GO FUG YOURSELF HQ WEST

As dictated to Intern G. Clooney.

TO: BLAKE LIVELY
RE: CDFA AWARDS DRESS

MUCH IMPROVED STOP THANK GOD YOU FINALLY PICKED SOMETHING THAT FITS PROPERLY STOP LOVE THE PINK STOP DON'T STOP STOP BUT STOP STICKING YOUR HANDS IN YOUR POCKETS LIKE THAT STOP IT'S AWKWARD STOP LIKE I SAID PLEASE STOP IT STOP LOVE JESSICA POSTSCRIPT WHY DON'T PEOPLE SEND TELEGRAMS ANYMORE QUERY I KNOW IT'S BECAUSE OF EMAIL BUT THEY'RE SO ROMANTIC STOP I THINK I'LL SEND ANOTHER STOP.

TO: MICHELLE TRACHTENBERG
RE CDFA AWARDS LOOK:

Continue reading Gossip Fug/Well Played, Blake Lively.

June 6, 2008

Fug Loss

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Wait, did I miss something?

When did The Addams Family become a ballet?

May 6, 2008

Met Ball Fug Carpet: Fergie

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And things had been going so well!

I am perplexed by the fact that she seems to have her wrap tucked into the top of her gown as some kind of impromptu sleeve, which is making her look weirdly wider than she actually is (which is: not at all), but it doesn't help that she looks INSANELY cranky. What happened in the car on the way over? Did she and Josh argue over the last of the Flaming Hot Cheetos? (Understandable. I can't stop eating those things even though they've been scientifically proven to make my stomach hurt. I am convinced they're dusted with crack.) Did the driver ask her if she's knocked up yet? (Also understandable, yet none of our business. Doesn't he know that you just closely study the waistline/drinking habits of every woman of child-bearing age and then speculate behind their backs?) Did Anna Wintour beat her in a footrace to the open bar? What up, Fergie Ferg? I secretly kind of love you now! Look alive!

May 5, 2008

Damafugs

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Everyone has different good-luck traditions. Some people wear pins, some have a special pair of underwear, and others who are Sharon Stone wear animal feet.

And some people, like Rose Byrne, wear Morticia Addams' right sleeve. How macabre! If she takes delivery of a box of flesh-eating plants tomorrow from a mystery suitor, we'll know it worked.

March 6, 2008

Fug or Fab: Rachel McAdams

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Whoa:

Nothing against famous designer, daughter, and hater of the one-legged Stella McCartney -- she's fabulous, I'm sure, and lovely -- but I'm not nearly as sure that Rachel McAdams was intentionally going for the Stella McCartney's Less Tanned Twin Sister look last night. I mean, I actually thought she WAS Stella until I saw the larger pic.

Speaking of:

Continue reading Fug or Fab: Rachel McAdams.

February 25, 2008

Oscar Fug Carpet Fug or Fab: Ellen Page

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Oh, ELLEN:

I know, I know. You love the Converse. You live in an old converted whorehouse. You're a smart kid and a bit of a tomboy. I like you. You seem smart. I think you're adorable. If I lived next door to you, we'd be hanging out, shooting the shit all the time. And if that were the case, today I would go shuffling over some time after noon with Tito's Tacos (for the hangover) and the papers, and we'd eat six or seven bags of chips and then I'd say, "Ellen, WTF?" And you'd roll your eyes, and then I'd say, "WHY DIDN'T YOU ASK ME?" and you'd say, "because you would have told me not to wear it." And I'd said, "And?" And you would say, "and you would have been right."

January 11, 2008

Medifug

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So, I watched Medium for the first time this week. I don't know. It's okay, I guess. Patricia Arquette's character seems so MOPEY. I may have got a bum episode, and I get that it's hard to have dream visions of terrible things and have no one believe you or whatever, but it must be exhausting to be so glum so much of the time. Especially since her character's glumness seems to have bled over into real life:

Babes, come on. You're attending the InStyle Diamond Luncheon Something Or Other. How bad can it be? At the very least, the gift bag should have some kind of sparkling goody in it! There's no need to pull out the old Somber Suit AND High Necked Blouse AND Dark Tights. Nothing wrong with looking demure to a luncheon, of course, but a wee tiny hint of skin somewhere would have gone a long way toward looking a bit more relaxed. This is what you wear when you're playing a guest role on Law and Order: Whatever Version as a former nun who's being forced to testify to cooking the parish books as a way to cover up some kind of gruesome -- yet justified! -- murder. On the other hand, you don't seem to have aged AT ALL since Flirting With Disaster and that was over 10 years ago. There's something to be said for that, at least.

December 9, 2005

Fugstin Davis

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The Family Stone premiere was like a Festival of Fug. Amanda Peet? First, this sack-cloth, next I expect to see her in ashes. Sarah Jessica Parker? Saggy and misshapen. And now SJP's erstwhile co-star, the gorgeous-no-matter-what-she's-wearing Kristin Davis shows up looking like a World War I widow:

I have to just say that I don't care what she's wearing: her hair is to die for. She's lovely. But....seriously, is that a hobble skirt? Did she just take off her Votes For Women suffrage ribbon? I certainly hope she doesn't get that ribbon caught in the manual crank of her horseless carriage. That would be a shame.

December 7, 2005

The Family Fug

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Sarah Jessica Parker made an uncharacteristic fashion misstep at the premiere of The Family Stone:

Say what you will about La Parker, she usually manages to leave the house looking neat and charming and flatteringly retro, and it almost always works. But here? She looks like she's wearing a burial shroud. I haven't read any reviews of The Family Stone yet, but even if it IS bad, I can't believe it could possibly be so bad as to qualify as SJP's funeral.

Results tagged “dreary” from GoFugYourself

Fugged to Death

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Gossip Fug/Well Played, Blake Lively

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Fug Loss

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Met Ball Fug Carpet: Fergie

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Damafugs

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Fug or Fab: Rachel McAdams

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Oscar Fug Carpet Fug or Fab: Ellen Page

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Medifug

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Fugstin Davis

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The Family Fug

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