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November 20, 2009

Fugronica Webb

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It is worthwhile to note that everyone else at the event Ms Webb here is attending is wearing a cocktail dress. Me, I'm of the belief that I would rather be over- than under-dressed, because if you're over-dressed, you can just convince people that you've just come from, or are on the way to, some FABULOUS event. If you're under-dressed, you just look like this:

And I can't think of an occasion in which you'd want to do that on purpose.

November 18, 2009

True Fug

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As I have said before, Sam Trammell is SO cute on True Blood. I spent much of the last season worried he was going to get killed off, especially those times when he turned into a bug. Perhaps the stress got to him, too, because he looks like he's just emerged from a week-long bender:

Oh, Sam. If you liked me, then you would have run a comb through it.

Let's see what the rest of that get-up looks like. I pray there are no sweatpants involved:

Continue reading True Fug.

October 1, 2009

Fuglycat Dolls

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Kimberly Wyatt, AKA The Pussycat Doll Who Is Currently The Only Pussycat Doll Leaving The House Which, If You Think About It, Is Kind of Weird, is deeply perplexing:

[Photo: Splash News]

Like, this is surely not the first time I've noted that a celebrity is wearing something previously modeled by Frank, the dude who lives in my alley, but it is definitely the first time I have meant it.

September 4, 2009

Star Fugs

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"Help me, Rachel Zoe!"

"You're my only hope!"

September 4, 2009

Fug and Fug: In Fug

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I am concerned about Tori:

She is not going to a yard sale. She is not cleaning out her closet. She is not hanging out at Home Depot, looking at faucets and light fixtures. She is not buying compost. She is not looking at used toilets listed on Craigslist. She's not taking out the trash. She's not running out for coffee filters and toilet paper. She's not moving her car for street cleaning. She's not late for her O-Chem final. She's not starring in an episode of Law and Order in which someone who appeared on What Not to Wear is murdered after backsliding into their old way of dressing. She's at an m-fing wine-tasting/photo op. In grody moccasins and old cut-offs. SHE MUST BE CLINICALLY DEPRESSED. Right? I mean, that's the only acceptable explanation.

August 18, 2009

Fugthew Settle

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"Hi guys!"

"Can't wait to see the movie! What's that? NO. My hair is NOT attached to my cap. How dare you! Excuse me? Certainly not! I did not at all just crash this party on the way back to my apartment from a beer run. I never! Could you please repeat that? You must be joking! OF COURSE Rufus hasn't become a busker who wanders Grand Central Station lonely and unwashed, singing "She's Always A Woman" over and over and over again because he's heartbroken about some Lily-related issue, and besides, that's a spoiler. This hair just HAPPENED, none of my hats fit over all my sexy brains properly and I HAVE TO GO NOW."

August 11, 2009

New Fug

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I know Billy Burke has played a creepy attorney who is probably also a super-crafty stalker/rapist/serial killer on The Closer over the past couple of seasons*, but you'd think the thing he'd take away from that role was, like, a desire to exorcise its creepitude by then spending the next day rolling around with puppies and snuggling little babies and talking to unicorns and embracing rainbows:

HERE, he kinda looks like he woke up and said, "damn, I miss looking like I could snap at any moment! Come here, pomade! Let's make some magic!"

* Yes, Twilight fans, I know he also plays The Most Ineffectual Father In "Literature," Charlie Swan, but I felt like you guys were probably already working on a detailed explication of what happens when Edward's hair winds up on Charlie's head, and I didn't want to step on your territory. I do care, you know.

August 3, 2009

The Fugbrarian

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From afar, Noah Wyle looks as dreamy as ever:

Nice suit! Call me, John Carter! But let's take a closer look:

Continue reading The Fugbrarian.

July 30, 2009

Love Sex Fugs

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MOLLY SIMS:...Ciara.

CIARA: ...Molly.

MOLLY: What did they tell YOU the dress code was for this thing?

CIARA: Um. Joan Collins: Bandleader. Obviously. What did they tell you?

MOLLY: Depressed Horse Trainer. Clearly.

CIARA: Huh.

MOLLY: What are these bitches trying to do to us?

CIARA: Let's get 'em.

July 23, 2009

Solo Fug

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SOLANGE KNOWLES. You have GRAVELY DISAPPOINTED ME.

Sure, you've belted what is obviously just a large pajama top and left the house in it. BUT SO WHAT? That's totally JV Fug Squad behavior and you know it. You're a star on the varsity team! You'd have been voted Rookie of the Year last year if it hadn't been for that pesky -- and curiously currently MIA -- Aubrey O'Day! Honestly, if this thing were two inches longer, you'd look totally normal. WHITHER THE FEATHERS? Where is your face paint? WHY aren't you wearing leggings with, like, bagels or casserole dishes printed on them? (I'm hungry.) Shouldn't you be wearing a bolero jacket made of twigs, sewn together with dental floss? As the bumper sticker says, Solange, WHY BE NORMAL?

PS: I just read that you shaved your head yesterday, prior to this function, and that you're wearing a wig here. DUDE! THAT is what I'm talking about. And while I'm relieved to see that you're clearly wearing something quasi-nutty in those shots of you sporting the bald look, I have to tell you non-sarcastically: you look awesome bald. Seriously. Way better than Britney. Your head is well-formed. So, my further advice is to ditch the wig and rock your skull. OMG: You could even occasionally allow your face paint to DRIFT ONTO YOUR HEAD. Promise me you'll think about it. PLEASE SOLANGE.

Results tagged “you couldn't try a bit harder?” from GoFugYourself

Fugronica Webb

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True Fug

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Fuglycat Dolls

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Star Fugs

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Fug and Fug: In Fug

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Fugthew Settle

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New Fug

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The Fugbrarian

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Love Sex Fugs

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Solo Fug

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