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February 14, 2005

Grammy Awards: Pre-Party Fug Carpet

Oh, Kelly. I hate to say it because you look happy, but... it's not funny:


[Photo courtesy of Daily Celeb.]


What are you doing? That wig makes you look like an extra in Hairspray, and not in a good way.

And, I've heard of matching one's shoes to one's dress, or even one's handbag or assorted accessories. But I've never heard of matching one's dress to one's teeth. In addition to investigating some industrial-strength anti-perspirant, Ms. Osbourne might want to pick up a pack of White Strips.

72 Comments

That's...not even slighly attractive. Bad makeup job, wet pits, and yellow teeth. Way overfugged.

She's heading to the Resident Evil Prom.
What sad is that her face powder looks whiter than her teeth !

She's heading to the Resident Evil Prom.
What sad is that her face powder looks whiter than her teeth !

I'm just so glad I stopped by your site today. Because it's my day off and I didn't want to have to face the site of Kelly's fright wig on a work day. Why do I feel like that wig is just the last stop on a train headed for a soundproofed, padded room in some upscale psych ward?

yeesh...scary

Anyone remember those cheesy horror movies about the puppets that came to life and wandered around killing people in messy ways? Yeah. She's either one of those, or she's Bride of Chucky.

But I gotta say I envy her waist. I always wished I was one of those people who stored fat as proper curves instead of just going BallPark hotdog all over.

i heard she WAS going to be in hairspray. ferreal.

Um, is mental-health in a can available anywhere? How about drive-thru head-shrink? There is absolutely no explanation for this unless she is making her Broadway debut in Hairspray. Bad, bad, bad. I can hear Sharon Osborne now...

Truly frightening in every way possible. I hate her more now than anything I have ever hated before. Seriously, her and old Chloe' should go be lesbians somewhere together and find a way to mate and create a pack of uber ugly people.

what????
until now i didn't think that she could get worse than the "kermit" outfit. this is really, really not right. do we think she's trying for irony? does she actually think that she looks good? i almost can't believe that she thinks she looks good, i'm going to have to go for the ironic angle. but, still, even if irony is what she's attempting....don't go out in public like this. please. for the love of all that is attractive in this world.
AND FOR GOD'S SAKE, BUY SOME SECRET!! if it's strong enough for a man, it just might work on this beast.

one more thing...
it does make sense that her eyes are closed. she probably can't even stand to look at herself.

I agree with all of the comments about Kelly's hair, make-up, and perspiration problems--but I draw the line at ragging on her teeth.

She is English after all.

WHAT THE FUCK AM I LOOKING AT HERE?

Ohmygod! I can't even describe the fright I had when catching a glimpse of this one. AAAAKKKKK

so so very beige.

ditto to harmonious yikes

Oh my sweet baby Jesus in a manger, she must be possessed by the devil. You can tell by the maniacal grin. Quick grab some Holy Water and repeat after me: "The power of Christ compels you!"

ARGH! AAAARRRRRGGGGGHHHH!

It's funny that you mention she should be in Hairspray -I'm thinking of another John Waters creation. She looks like an inhabitant of Mortville, the town of deviants and criminals in the film "Desperate Living."

I think it IS ok to rag on her teeth, English-ness aside, because she lives in Beverly Hills and is thereby contractually obligated to display ginormous Chiclet-white teeth at all times.

Other than that, ge-SCHNAPP!

Monica Lewinsky hits the skids.

It's just so, so very sad. The young Miss Osbourne has such potential to be a total cutie-patootie. Also--she is filthy, stinking [literally?] rich, can she not afford decent deodorant?

ok, so the wig is bad - but it's obviously a joke. I'd wear it but spice it up by adding things to it - like little toy boats and glitter (but that's just me - I have a thing for wigs).

As a woman with boobs and not enough tops to show them off, I like the top. The pit stains have to go, but the top kind of rocks in my book.

If you're going to wear a weird Kabuki wig and makeup, you need to go all the way and wear a weird kimono, not a sweaty beige prom dress.

Remember the cartoon where Bugs Bunny was running from the monster that was just a huge mound of hair with eyes and feet . . . and then Bugs stops and gives it a manicure . . . .no?. . . Well, remember the episode of the Brady Bunch when Jan wanted to be different, so she wore that big black wig to her friends party and was telling everyone she was the "new" Jan Brady. . . .no?

Holy HAIRDOS Batman!! That is just scary. *shudder*

One word : ANTI-PERSPERANT.

Hey, I grew up in England, and I managed to come out of it with fine teeth. And I don't have her big bucks. So I feel like I can rag on her pearly "whites."

Well I'll be! If it isn't BohdisattFug!!

http://www.public.iastate.edu/~paddler/bodhisattva/budlaugh.htm

"Remember the cartoon where Bugs Bunny was running from the monster that was just a huge mound of hair with eyes and feet . . . and then Bugs stops and gives it a manicure . . . .no?"

Alderene, I love you.

And c'mon, your pancake makeup should never be whiter than your teeth. Her makeup artist must've been cracking the fuck up.

Jesus wept.

Forget anti-perspirant - hell, she can afford the Botox injections that everyone else in Hollywood gets this time of year. And laser whitening. I can understand the costume-party look, it's to be expected from the Grammys. But the rest is just nasty.

she reminds me of those scary porcelin dolls dressed like geishas..they used to give me nightmares, now Kelly does...

and lets not forget the BOW!

...well...her tits look nice.

I think she actually is going to be in Hairspray.

At least that's the interet gossip page in me talking.

I've seen bad wigs and that makes bad wigs seem decent.

Kelly, spring for a frickin' manicure. I'm not talking tips just a cleansing under the nail and a nice buff. Yikes!

"You monsters are such interesting creatures! I was just saying to my girlfriend, just the other day, 'Monsters are such interesting people! Why I'll bet they lead such interesting lives!' The things you must see and the things you must do! My stars!"

The monster's name was Gossamer, I believe.

Well, at least her boobs look great!

A hearty hell yeah to all of the above....However, I do like the lipstick. It's a good color.

" If I can't be beautiful,I'll be as ulgy as I possibly can." Sad. She has such lovley skin and nice boobs.

Yes,thank you, it was Gossamer!

I am weeping little tears of joy that someone reminded me of Gossamer the big orange monster, and that someone else knew not *just* the "You monsters have the most innnnarestin' hairdos" line, but the rest of the monologue! Loving on you, Arderene and Dimestore Lipstick!

Can we have a picture of Gossamer instead?

Actually, she is rumored to be taking a part in Hairspray....perhaps this is a tribute?

Here's your Gossamer - looks kinda like a heart, appropriate for Valentine's Day, no?

http://www.kohledfusion.com/ducati/gossimer/happyGossm.jpg

HOLY CRAP. My eyes and mind have been molested by such ugly shit...I just....can't...go ...on...

Is she a recycled Ricki Lake from Hairspray? Eeek! I'm scared.

My eyes! Dear lord, MY EYES!!!!
Um, nice melons?

I'm SO sleeping with the lights on tonight. *shudder*

Um, well, I guess at least her face looks small??? Just trying to find the silver lining...

Simply...horrific...

Nice pit stains.

I actually gasped when I saw this. After that, there's just nothing left to say.

Where'd the image go? Something this bad needs to be preserved.

Does anyone else think that she looks freakishly like the female alien things from Mars Attacks?

Does anyone else think that she looks freakishly like the female alien things from Mars Attacks?

Oh I don't think Mela.....I know.

Why would you want to make yourself look like this? Why? Is there something I'm missing?!

Most of the pictures are missing. Can't see Kelly Osbourne, Janet Jackson, Aaron Carter, Blu Cantrell, Mandy Moore, Renee Olstead. Is anyone else having this problem?

I just...I mean...it doesn't...I can't...

Sigh. I'm stumped.

damn, she really IS British!
Memo to Kelly: Close mouth...with superglue!

God and the bow is like "Send help...Jesus Christ I must be put on here with TAPE like they do babies please just call my family...gakk..."

Damn. She is just to to' up for words. She looks like the Joker.

If I ever become gay, this will be the reason why.

WTF!...are you thinking...or not thinking...you have $, use it to your advantage...like for a stylist and some teeth whitening and i'm sure you can afford some deoderant...please use it. I don't give a damn if you want to make a statement that you're not like all the teeny hollywood pop icons, truly we don't care! just do something with yourself PLEASE so i can stop having nightmares of wigs attacking me.

And if you're this hell bent on dressing like the soon-to-be crazy lady with 12 cats, stay in the damn house and save us the grief.

She looks like she's going to come at me through the camera and eat my face. She kind of reminds me of something from a Japanese horror film, or El Chupacabra. I admire her for going out like this, though. She's obviously having fun with it.

oh.my.god.

There is no god.

fugalicious

I was thinking "Hairspray" meets" "The Rocky Horror Picture Show" and Miss Divine all together = Kelly's fugliness.

EWWWWW! LOOK AT HER HAIR, THEN SHE HAS SWEAT ON HER ARMITS, AND HER HAIR! THEN HER LIP STICK IS PLUM, WITH THAT UGLY DRESS? THEN THE BOW...

ok dudes this has gone too far. we must all attack the brittish with teeth whiteners. so then kelly wudn't have an excuse. and geeze the pit stains. oh the pitstains!

the teeth, outfit, hair, and makeup are inexcusable. however, i have some empathy about the sweaty pits. i have that problem a lot, and sometimes even the best deodorant doesn't really do the job.

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