Okay, so Kristin Cavallari looks totally cute in this dress. I have to admit that even though the Laguna Beach kids make me want to rip out my own hair and hang myself with it.
So why am I fugging her? Because she is a fake tan away from completing her transformation into Jessica Simpson. And that makes me sad, in part because Jessica Simpson makes me want to rip out my own hair, glue it back on so that I can rip it out again, use it to flog myself, and then hang myself with it, but also because if you don't have a personality of your own to shove down our throats, then please, at least select one to clone that isn't all smoke and mirrors and PR and Mystic Tan. And choose one that isn't so overdone: We already have a mini-Jessica, and her name is Ashlee, and Kristin had best beware of any hulking Svengali dads lurking in the bushes with a damp hanky at the ready, because Pa Simpson will not be amused that his formula is being copied.
Sigh. I really wish she'd cloned herself while wearing something hideous. Still, ever the poster child for negativity, I will add that I wish she'd painted her toenails.
