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February 26, 2007

Oscar Fug Carpet: Eva Green

What is the DEAL with Eva Green? She was so hot in Casino Royale, but every time she appears somewhere under the auspices of playing herself, she shows up looking like she's an emissary from the undead:

"Beware, human lifeform! I have come to this place for one purpose and one purpose only: to drain your puny corpse of its sweet, salty nectar.  Don't try to escape me, for my living corpse never grows tired and can not be outwitted. I will feast on your brainmeat tonight... tomorrow night... or the night after that. Whichever. But know this! Whenever you lie down to sleep your human sleep, I will pounce! Whenever you close your eyes to think, I will bite! Whenever you look away from your glowing, anemic computer screen, it is I who will standing outside your window. As long as it's dark out while you're working, because I can't leave my apartment until nightfall. But these are details, MORTAL, details. Details that I will work out whilst slumbering the breathless sleep of the undead, details that can not prevent my coming for you. MWHHAHAHAHAHAHA. Also, you should know that, being undead, I can't ever check my hair in the mirror. In case you were wondering. Anyway. WATCH OUT. Your sweet existence-fuel is mine!"

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Bai Ling

The Book of fug

A book, huh? Is it just stuff you already put on the Web site?

Nope, we wrote the whole thing fresh, just for you.

Awesome. In that case, I want to read it!

Thank you! Click here to find out all the details!

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