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April 8, 2008

Idol Fugs Back

Well, the American Idol philanthropy talent show airs tonight, and -- SPOILER! -- the stylists for that show are still on crack.

I hope it turns out Brooke White was performing in a rousing group medley of "Chain Gang" and "Jailhouse Rock," or an interpretive dance version of what community service might look like -- say, if you were assigned to pick up trash by the side of the road with one of those long claws. Otherwise, what the hell?

Of course, given Brooke's on-air propensity for jabbering at the judges, I imagine the conversation with the stylists may have been a little bit frustrating and maybe it's not their fault.

STYLIST: I gotta be honest with you, dawg...

BROOKE: Okay.

STYLIST: For me, it isn't your best...

BROOKE: Yeah. TOTALLY.

STYLIST: ... isn't your best look, I mean...

BROOKE: I completely agree, yes. YES.

STYLIST: Are you going to let me ...

BROOKE: It's all right. No, it's all right!

STYLIST: What? No, it's not, you look...

BROOKE: Right. I love your hair tonight!

STYLIST: ... you look TERRIBLE IN THAT. YOU ARE NOT TWELVE.

BROOKE: Thank you!

STYLIST: THAT'S NOT A COMPL...

BROOKE: Okay!

STYLIST: I quit.

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