The majority of you forgave Rihanna for dressing like a lemon cake. But can you forgive her for this contraption?

Before we all write this off as Rihanna being deeply original and offbeat, I should point you to our girl Kelly Clarkson, who did the "Like A Dead Virgin" thing a few years ago with -- I think -- equally stupid results. Of course, Kelly stopped short of strapping her tutu to a weight belt, and did not take care to add... what is that, a dickey? With tiny sleeves? A RUBBER dickey? It's bad enough that I look at a transparent tutu pyramid and shrug, "Eh, been there, seen that," but a DICKEY? Is THIS really where we are now, America?
Also, I know it's just a reflection off her metallic collar -- and we all know how awkward it can be when our metallic collars catch the light weirdly; it's my private pain -- but whenever I look at her neck, I see half of a gleaming silver mask staring back at me. Do you think her maybe-probably-boyfriend Chris Brown was gazing up at her and silently singing, "Rubber Dickey, you're the one; you make Sexy Time lots of fun! Rubber Dickey I'm awfully fond of you"? Or was he too busy thinking, "The PHAAAAAAANTOM of the Opera is HEEEEEEERE, INSIDE MY MIND"?
Before we all write this off as Rihanna being deeply original and offbeat, I should point you to our girl Kelly Clarkson, who did the "Like A Dead Virgin" thing a few years ago with -- I think -- equally stupid results. Of course, Kelly stopped short of strapping her tutu to a weight belt, and did not take care to add... what is that, a dickey? With tiny sleeves? A RUBBER dickey? It's bad enough that I look at a transparent tutu pyramid and shrug, "Eh, been there, seen that," but a DICKEY? Is THIS really where we are now, America?
Also, I know it's just a reflection off her metallic collar -- and we all know how awkward it can be when our metallic collars catch the light weirdly; it's my private pain -- but whenever I look at her neck, I see half of a gleaming silver mask staring back at me. Do you think her maybe-probably-boyfriend Chris Brown was gazing up at her and silently singing, "Rubber Dickey, you're the one; you make Sexy Time lots of fun! Rubber Dickey I'm awfully fond of you"? Or was he too busy thinking, "The PHAAAAAAANTOM of the Opera is HEEEEEEERE, INSIDE MY MIND"?




