The Fug-Files

Of all the premieres for Bai Ling to attend semi-inexplicably, the one for the X-Files movie seems the most apt. After all, our girl IS somewhat paranormal, and I want to believe that her truth is out there. Certainly she is not shy about exposing certain facts about herself.

Like, say, her nipples. Although her Band-Aids of Truth today seem to carry a message about love and humanity, so maybe she thinks that her shadowy areolae are the ultimate unifying gift to an unkind, divided human race that knows no compassion. Or, she just didn't realize they were showing.

Nips aside, the rest of this appears shockingly modest, almost like she is in the middle of choreographing a figure-skating routine that's an ode to amber traffic lights. But it's Bai, so there is always SOMETHING else going on -- and, in her words from her blog, "You have to go on line check out my dress tonigh, its insane, the back, you will be surprised...... Its french disgner, I love the yellow, its spring time and always happy." (That entire sentence is sitting in a big pool of [sic], by the way.)

Time to end the suspense. Let's have a round of applause for the back:

Oh, sweet Bai. I cherish your "gotcha" expression; sure, the jungle feline on your back was a little unexpected, but how many times must we tell you that seeing a vast expanse of your skin isn't a surprise? What truth is THERE that we didn't already know?

Perhaps I'll let Bai herself enlighten us about all this, per her blog: "But why all the texi are yellow? Because they stand out? Or they are driving to spring break?"

Ah. Well, that explains it.

Unless THIS was the shock she meant: