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August 12, 2008

What We Fug Is Secret

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BIJOU PHILLIPS: Oh, Shane. Oh dear.

SHANE WEST: What? Why? What are you saying? Why are you dressed like Evil Spider Man's yodeling milkmaid girlfriend?

BIJOU: Have you been sniffling glue and chopping wood again?

SHANE: Huh? Where? What have you heard? What's going on?

BIJOU: Relax, dude. Go take a shower and clean yourself up a little.

SHANE: What do you mean? No, I absolutely was NOT out digging graves until 6 a.m. Why do you ask? WHAT DO YOU KNOW? TELL ME WHAT YOU KNOW.

BIJOU: I know that Scientology would love to help you with a lot of these problems. Come to a luncheon.

SHANE: Shhh. Quiet. I don't want to scare you, but I THINK BIJOU PHILLIPS IS FOLLOWING ME.

BIJOU: There, there. Tom Cruise will fix everything.

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A book, huh? Is it just stuff you already put on the Web site?

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