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September 3, 2008

Fugged to Basics

Uh, you guys? Which one of you said you were going to talk to Christina about her makeup?

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[Photo: Splash]

I KNOW I assigned one of you to that at our last meeting. Did you and the dude who was supposed to be handling Celebrities Wearing The Wrong Size Shoe, and the people on the No One Else Can See What Size It Is, So Go Up One If You Have To task force just go out for drinks, or something? DO I HAVE TO DO EVERYTHING AROUND HERE?

Okay, okay. I accept your apology. And you're right: I had reassigned all of you to the Emergency WTF Is Up With Those Jeans Katie Holmes Keeps Wearing? Squad. But that's under control now. I need you guys back on the Aguilera beat.

Oh, and hey! When you confront her, maybe you can show her this, to remind her how fresh and young and gorgeous she can look when she loses the mask?
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LIKE A WHOLE OTHER PERSON.

PS: When you're done with her, please nibble on that cute baby's little ears for us, would you? Thanks so much. But then get your asses right back to the bunker. We need to talk about what we're going to do about AnnaLynne McCord's wardrobe on 90210.

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A book, huh? Is it just stuff you already put on the Web site?

Nope, we wrote the whole thing fresh, just for you.

Awesome. In that case, I want to read it!

Thank you! Click here to find out all the details!

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