No, no, Nicole Scherzinger. I should be saluting YOU.
It's your relentless commitment to helping the girls put the "tart" in "tartan" -- not to mention the "arg" in "argyle" -- that keeps me cheerful and optimistic. Because I know that in either fallow OR fertile fug times, you and your expensively homeless-looking band of burlesque demi-nudists will always be there for me. It's your faces that are etched in the Mount Rushmore of my heart.
Also, could you recommend a good strapless bra? I mean, you show us yours so much, it's only fair that you drop a little hint now and again. Come on, help a sister out here. My only criteria is that it not be covered in TOO much glitter or sequins. That itches, plus -- and I realize this may not be something you ever need to consider -- it's a real bitch to wear that UNDER your clothes.
It's your relentless commitment to helping the girls put the "tart" in "tartan" -- not to mention the "arg" in "argyle" -- that keeps me cheerful and optimistic. Because I know that in either fallow OR fertile fug times, you and your expensively homeless-looking band of burlesque demi-nudists will always be there for me. It's your faces that are etched in the Mount Rushmore of my heart.
Also, could you recommend a good strapless bra? I mean, you show us yours so much, it's only fair that you drop a little hint now and again. Come on, help a sister out here. My only criteria is that it not be covered in TOO much glitter or sequins. That itches, plus -- and I realize this may not be something you ever need to consider -- it's a real bitch to wear that UNDER your clothes.
