[Photo: Splash News]
L.C.: Sniffle. Whitney, it's just so awful!
WHITNEY: I know. I know.
L.C.: I just didn't see it coming. I mean, I guess there were signs... I just didn't SEE them, you know?
WHITNEY: I do.
L.C.: Maybe I just didn't WANT to see them. I wanted to believe the best in you.
WHITNEY: Wait, what? ME? What did I do? What are you talking about?
L.C.: What were YOU talking about?
WHITNEY: I don't know. Whatever dumb thing we were fake-telling each other for The Hills. I know I'm always questioning you about stuff, but it's not in my contract that I have to listen to your answers -- they only pay me to ask and nod.
L.C.: Oh. I was talking about your pants.
WHITNEY: What's wrong with my pants?
L.C.: LOOK at them.
WHITNEY: You don't LIKE these?
L.C.: THEY ARE HILARIOUS. But terrible, I've only ever seen pants like that in the photo albums, of, like, really old people who actually remember the 80s, and love Whitesnake and stuff. Also ,
WHITNEY: I... don't have a question for this occasion.
L.C.: And the shoes scare me, too. At least mine are badass YSL Tribute t-straps. Yours look like physical therapy.
WHITNEY: Oh, wait, here's a question, smartass: Did you know grunge went out ten years ago?
L.C.: You are so hateful. No wonder we don't give you much to do. And to think I trusted you to ask me about myself all these years!
WHITNEY: Oh yeah? Well, have fun begging Audrina to quiz you about what you did today, because me and my zipper pants are OUTTA HERE.
L.C.: Wait, don't go! This is the most informative conversation we've had in months! Can't you at least end it with some silent facial expressions?
WHITNEY: Fine, but just let MTV know that I charge by the head-bob. And lip-biting costs extra.
