Considering that the trailer for He's Just Not That Into You is an epically unfunny letdown when you factor in the huge, experienced cast -- in addition to the fact that Jess and I have had lengthy discussions on how the emphasis being placed on "not," which you can see in this backdrop, seems wrong; shouldn't it be either "He's just not that into you," or, "He's just not that into you, or even, "He's just not that into you"? -- I suppose it's apt that all the clothes these actresses wore to the premieres are epic letdowns as well. Personally, I am just not that into Scarlett Johansson's fabric choices lately. Like, what is this?
I hate dipping back into the old "I once saw a $1500 sofa in that pattern," nor do I want to regurgitate that faithful "bed in a bag" jibe or even "I think her stylist should stop showing her wallpaper samples." Even though they all apply. But fortunately, the ACTUAL first image that came into my head was of one of those ornate Russian nesting dolls, and after a couple similarly themed complaints came in from our readers, I decided to embrace that angle:
I hate dipping back into the old "I once saw a $1500 sofa in that pattern," nor do I want to regurgitate that faithful "bed in a bag" jibe or even "I think her stylist should stop showing her wallpaper samples." Even though they all apply. But fortunately, the ACTUAL first image that came into my head was of one of those ornate Russian nesting dolls, and after a couple similarly themed complaints came in from our readers, I decided to embrace that angle:
Can't you just see them sitting on your fireplace mantel? Or rolling under the couch because the cat jumped up there and knocked them asunder, then tried to chew the head off the smallest one?
I guess the upside of that is, the mental picture could also include discovering a stray $20 in change down there in that forest of dust bunnies beneath the sofa, along with your lost slippers and the Britney Spears DVD compilation of her best videos (which your spouse/partner/roommate/parent/sibling thought they'd hidden from you for good so that you'd stop playing the karaoke "Toxic" all day). The downside is that looking at this screaming pattern, reminiscent of blossoms cultivated in a greenhouse sponsored by Pepto Bismol -- is actually making my eyes throb so badly that watching an entire marathon of The Hills might actually SOOTHE them.
