How do I fug thee?
f
Let me count the ways:
1) I fug thee to the depth and breadth and height thy blazer can reach, which is to say, that thing is longer than your actual outfit;
2) I fug thee freely, as I strive for right -- and that formal-shorts-romper-thing, the likes of which I bought from Express in eighth grade and wore to school dances, is the opposite of right. You are not in a period-specific remake of 90210, Shenae. You're in an updated continuation of the story of the West Beverly High walls' innumerable bad paint jobs.
3) I fug thee with the passion put to use in my old griefs -- because SERIOUSLY, how many times do I have to complain about you lousy kids and your misperception that mangy laddered hose are attractive? -- and if God choose, I should fug thee better after death, which will come about because your inexplicably sloppy and ridiculous tights HAVE FINALLY FREAKING KILLED ME.
