It's been quite a week of fuggery, hasn't it? M.I.A. and Mayisha at the Grammys, Roisin Murphy's pants, Zooey Deschanel's saggy dress, and Alice Dellal's eye-searing number that almost made me cry blood... And it's only Thursday. We still have ONE MORE DAY and we've already been exposed to enough strong fug rays to get a screaming burn. Too bad they dont make fugscreen lotion.
Let's see if this is the next best thing:
Yes, that's right, The Rock -- oops, I mean, Dwayne Johnson; sorry -- YOU just might be the cure. You are ridiculously smooth. And soothing. You are charming eye candy, a lozenge in these sore-throated times of pained screams at the sight of Alice Dellal's crotch trying to peek out from behind a strip of spandex. Thank you for being you, Dwayne. Thank you on behalf of all Dwaynes in the world for making the name Dwayne cool (get back to me when you can bodyslam an angry dude in tights, Dwayne Wade; and sorry, Dwayne Wayne, but you didn't quite get there either). And thank you for lowering my blood pressure. If we are ever hiring another intern to help lighten George's workoad, we promise to consider your application.
And now, buoyed by the calming sight of his mug (and the memory of what it looked like when he wore his WWE spankies), I am ready to confront another day. Bring it on, Friday. DO YOUR WORST.
Let's see if this is the next best thing:
Yes, that's right, The Rock -- oops, I mean, Dwayne Johnson; sorry -- YOU just might be the cure. You are ridiculously smooth. And soothing. You are charming eye candy, a lozenge in these sore-throated times of pained screams at the sight of Alice Dellal's crotch trying to peek out from behind a strip of spandex. Thank you for being you, Dwayne. Thank you on behalf of all Dwaynes in the world for making the name Dwayne cool (get back to me when you can bodyslam an angry dude in tights, Dwayne Wade; and sorry, Dwayne Wayne, but you didn't quite get there either). And thank you for lowering my blood pressure. If we are ever hiring another intern to help lighten George's workoad, we promise to consider your application.
And now, buoyed by the calming sight of his mug (and the memory of what it looked like when he wore his WWE spankies), I am ready to confront another day. Bring it on, Friday. DO YOUR WORST.
