Let's talk about Kate Moss, here:
[Photo: Splash News]
May we talk frankly? I know that we can, dear readers. And we need to, about these shorts. Do they look okay on Kate Moss? Yes. Does that mean that a semi-substantial subsection of the general public will soon run out to purchase very short pleated shorts? Unfortunately, my vast experience in these matters means that I can tell you, with nearly complete confidence, that it means exactly that. Will the majority of said subsection manage to pull off these shorts with any kind of aplomb? As someone with fleshy inner thighs, I can assure you that I personally could not. And as someone with working eyes, I can also tell you that much of the world ALSO has fleshy inner thighs and it stands to reason, mathemathically, that if you were to construct a Venn diagram in which A is all the women in the world who have a tendency to buy things after having seen Kate Moss wear them, and B consists of my fleshy inner-thighed brethren, there will in fact be a generous overlap in between the two. Which means that six weeks from now, that sound you hear will be the screams of women who have stumbled into the ladies room at their local watering hole, wearing these shorts, and who have had their wits refreshed by several rounds of refreshing beer, and who will thereupon realize that OH MY GOD THESE SHORTS LOOK TERRIBLE ON THEM. Consider yourself warned.
May we talk frankly? I know that we can, dear readers. And we need to, about these shorts. Do they look okay on Kate Moss? Yes. Does that mean that a semi-substantial subsection of the general public will soon run out to purchase very short pleated shorts? Unfortunately, my vast experience in these matters means that I can tell you, with nearly complete confidence, that it means exactly that. Will the majority of said subsection manage to pull off these shorts with any kind of aplomb? As someone with fleshy inner thighs, I can assure you that I personally could not. And as someone with working eyes, I can also tell you that much of the world ALSO has fleshy inner thighs and it stands to reason, mathemathically, that if you were to construct a Venn diagram in which A is all the women in the world who have a tendency to buy things after having seen Kate Moss wear them, and B consists of my fleshy inner-thighed brethren, there will in fact be a generous overlap in between the two. Which means that six weeks from now, that sound you hear will be the screams of women who have stumbled into the ladies room at their local watering hole, wearing these shorts, and who have had their wits refreshed by several rounds of refreshing beer, and who will thereupon realize that OH MY GOD THESE SHORTS LOOK TERRIBLE ON THEM. Consider yourself warned.
