Lily Allen Archives

October 26, 2009

Fug or Fab: Lily Allen

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We got an email from one of our eagle-eyed readers this morning regarding Lily Allen here. Our reader noted that Lily looked surprisingly cute:

I'm busy reading 600 haiku right now, so I'm just going to let the inmates take over this particular asylum:

poll by twiigs.com

September 9, 2009

Fugright, Fug

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Lily Allen looks about as excited by this outfit as I am.

Which is to say, she looks like somebody said, "Hey, Lily, either wear this outfit, or hang out at home having paper clips pounded into your nail beds by a meat tenderizer -- your choice," and now that she's on the red carpet, she's thinking, "Shit, I shouldn't have picked door number one -- maybe I'll bolt early and swing by an office-supplies store." And that is probably the same expression that would be on my face if I were caught outside in a very elaborate bathing-suit cover-up, looking like I'd been punched in both my eyes. But don't fret, Lily -- I'm pretty sure Lady Gaga has never done paper-clip fingernails, so at least you'll have her beat on that.

August 24, 2009

Lily Fuglen

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Okay then:

[Photo: Splash News]

Your move, Lady Gaga.

July 13, 2009

Fug You

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I'm sure it's very difficult these days for some singers to compete with the likes of Katy Perry and Lady Gaga, for whom every appearance on-stage -- and off, usually, also -- is an excuse to dress like they've been using crack rock as ice cubes in their diet sodas before licking the backs of South American cane toads and sniffing glue.

So it's really nice to see Lily Allen refusing to pander.

[Photo: Splash News]

I mean, you can't even SEE her crotch! It's practically prude!

July 1, 2009

Fugly Allen

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I'm not really sure what's going on with Lily Allen these days, and usually she's kind of Out There and jabbering about something or other, so I decided to look up her Twitter feed. According to that, sometime in the last 24 hours "someone just took [her] nuts from under [her] nose" -- which would be upsetting whether she's talking about figurative testes, literal ones, or even just a pot of lightly salted cashews -- and a few hours before THAT, she wrote, "Today I am purely a spectator."

Perhaps that explains this:

[Photo: FlynetOnline.com]

Clearly, Lily didn't choose this -- she merely SPECTATED while her id staged a coup and junked up those cute shoes by pairing them with leggings, a cheap nightie, and a vest that looks like she nuked a piece of tin foil and then peeled it off the microwave walls and wore it out to the bar. It's very... it's like a dash of Lohan's delusion, a few tablespoons of Katie Price's tackyness, and a sprinkling of Posh's desire to make heads turn by looking semi-alien. If this is the result of having one's nuts swiped from under one's nose, I am going to lock mine up in a very safe place indeed.

March 19, 2009

Lily Fuggen

Lily Allen apparently decided to celebrate her probable Fug Madness win over Charlize Theron a bit on the early side.

[Photo: FlynetOnline.com]

I guess the benefit of making a tutu out of a pleated Hefty bag is, if you REALLY get hammered, you can puke in it. Not sure what the advantage is to wearing my old gym sneakers from fifth grade, though, unless she's trying to bring back cankles.

January 23, 2009

Alright, Fug II: The Alrightening

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Seriously, is it No Pants Week and someone forgot to tell me? I need to be KEPT APPRISED of these things, you guys.

January 22, 2009

Alright, Fug

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"No, I'm seriously asking you. I need you to settle an argument we're having:

[Photo: Splash]

Is this very short dress or a long shirt? Come on! Don't pretend you don't have an opinion."

poll by twiigs.com

October 8, 2008

Fugliest Things

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bad shoes

I think I like Lily Allen's shorter haircut:

The outfit is only okay. I wouldn't be at all surprised to learn that several party guests absently ordered martinis from her and/or handed her their coats, but no cartoon characters are vomiting up blood all over her skirt so I consider it a small victory. In fact, if I didn't know from other pictures and blogs that she'd been a total sweaty, blurry mess lately, I might have patted her on the back for pulling it together long enough to stand upright and smile.

Her shoes, though, are giving me frown lines:

Continue reading Fugliest Things.

September 30, 2008

Fug or Fab: Lily Allen and Emma Watson

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LILY ALLEN: Hey, Emma.

EMMA WATSON: LILY!

LILY: What's up? You sound upset.

EMMA: Are you going to Dior today?

LILY: Yeah. I'm walking over there right now.

EMMA: ME TOO. I'M SCARED.

LILY: Why are you yelling?

EMMA: I don't know.

LILY: Can we just talk when we get there, love?

EMMA: No. I told you, I'm scared. I'm scared you're going to show up with pink hair or wearing some kind of crazy dress with Bambi roasting on a spit or something and we'll be photographed together and people will think I approve. I need to know if I should bring a bag to put over one of our heads.

LILY: First of all, why don't you worry about YOURSELF? You could show up wearing some kind of wizard robes and carrying a magic stick.

EMMA: I've NEVER worn my Harry Potter costume out and about. And it's called a WAND, for your information.

LILY: Whatever. You've totally gone out in some crazy shit and I don't care. Loosen up, babes. For what it's worth, I look swell today.

EMMA: Well, so do I.

LILY: Really?

Continue reading Fug or Fab: Lily Allen and Emma Watson.

Lily Allen

Fug or Fab: Lily Allen

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Fugright, Fug

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Lily Fuglen

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Fug You

Fug file:

Fugly Allen

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Lily Fuggen

Alright, Fug II: The Alrightening

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Alright, Fug

Fug file:

Fugliest Things

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Fug or Fab: Lily Allen and Emma Watson

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