Misc. Awards Shows

January 26, 2009

SAG Awards Fug: Nicolette Sheridan

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The best part of this picture might be the women behind Nicolette Sheridan:

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Far Left is like, "I freaking love that you're taking a picture of this with your phone," and Near Left is like, "I know, but look at her! What is she doing? It's like she's welcoming peasants to the manor to partake of the leftovers of her Michaelmas feast. Except it's the 70s and instead of Michaelmas, it's her 4th Annual Arbor Day Key Party and she's still drunk." And Far Left is like, "But the color is pretty," and Near Left is like, "Yeah, but I think I just saw Blanche Devereux wearing this on a rerun of The Golden Girls. You KNOW somewhere Michael Bolton is totally smirking into his White Russian about this," and Far Left is like, "his White Russian?" and Near Left is all, "Please, you know he drinks them. Dude, this is going to be my best Facebook profile picture EVER."

Permalink | Posted By Jessica at 11:25 AM in Misc. Awards Shows
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January 26, 2009

SAG Awards Fug or Fab Carpet: Kate Winslet

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So, we've got lots to chat about here, but before we get talking outfits, there's something I have to address. I'm sure the real title of the following is Kate Winslet Wishes Mickey Rourke Good Luck, but I would like to refer to it as, Kate Winslet Meets Husband Number Three:

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THAT'S a comeback, bitches. Plus, imagine the interiews they'd both give about this! Sorry, Sam Mendes. I'm sure you're a wonderful man, but I need this to happen. If only because I feel like Kate MIGHT be able to gently nudge Mickey away from his fantastic-yet-alarming Bret Michaels-esque sartorial choices and back to what he used to look like, which, if you were not aware, was this:


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HELLO LOVER. America misses you.

Anyway, Kate:
Continue reading SAG Awards Fug or Fab Carpet: Kate Winslet.
Permalink | Posted By Jessica at 09:35 AM in Kate Winslet, Misc. Awards Shows
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January 19, 2009

NRJ Fug Awards

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I do not know what the NRJ Music Awards actually are -- other than being French, and....involving music -- but I know that any event whose red carpet invokes this expression on Katy Perry's face is A-OK with me:

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That's shock with a splash of awe right there. And when you've shocked/awed a woman who has performed dressed as a banana, you've got to be doing something right. Something like this:
Continue reading NRJ Fug Awards.
Permalink | Posted By Jessica at 12:12 PM in Katy Perry, Misc. Awards Shows, Random Fug
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January 9, 2009

Critics' Choice Awards Well Played, Evan Rachel Wood

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Last time we saw Evan "Dita" Rachel "Von Teese" Wood, she had broken up with Marilyn Manson but was still piling on the makeup as if she were impersonating his ex. Except that Evan Rachel Wood is, like, barely 21, and needs a face full of slap about as much as I need to rub butter all over my face and then let it bake in the sun.

For a refresher, here is how she looked:

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There is more where that came from -- but thankfully, that more did not come from last night. No, our girl showed up at the Critics' Choice Awards looking downright soft:

Continue reading Critics' Choice Awards Well Played, Evan Rachel Wood.
Permalink | Posted By Heather at 10:43 AM in Evan Rachel Wood, Misc. Awards Shows, Well Played
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January 9, 2009

Critics' Choice Awards Fug Carpet: Kristen Bell

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Kristen Bell has learned the hard way that aluminum foil is better used lining your baking sheets for easier cleanup than for fashion:

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Next up: Trying to make sure she doesn't turn to cling film next. And hustling her out of there before anyone slaps a pork chop on her stomach and attempts to fold her into a very elaborate swan.
Permalink | Posted By Heather at 10:01 AM in Kristen Bell, Misc. Awards Shows
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January 8, 2009

People's Choice Awards Fug Trial: Carrie Underwood

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It seems this year's winner of the Needless Multiple Costume Changes award at the People's Choice shindig was Carrie Underwood, who wore a relatively tame three different dresses -- I mean, if this were MTV, she'd have changed 20 times -- and I can't quite decide how I feel about any of them. So let's put her on trial, shall we?

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I present to you Exhibit A:

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The prosecution leaps to its feet and screams that this is a bit reminiscent of Sarah Larson's unpopular, shiny water-lilies-esque Oscar gown -- but as if this came from Monet's little-known Crabass Period where he threw a massive hissyfit over having to paint the same damn flowers all the time and rebelled by doing a portrait of the wallpaper in his mother's downstairs powder room. The defense narrows its eyes and points out that Carrie Underwood is seriously pretty and could make just about any old wallpaper look good, then casually asks if the pretty little souped-up four-wheel drive parked out front belongs to the prosecution, and sends a paralegal out to it with key. 



Next up is Exhibit B:
Continue reading People's Choice Awards Fug Trial: Carrie Underwood.
Permalink | Posted By Heather at 12:31 PM in Carrie Underwood, Misc. Awards Shows
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January 8, 2009

People's Choice Awards Fug Carpet: Lori Loughlin

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Let's discuss for a second how RANCID the new 90210 is. They pick up and drop plotlines like a serial dater. Drunkface still cannot act, and delivers 90 percent of her lines at warp speed. None of the relationships or friendships are remotely interesting. The clothes aren't even amusing enough to make me love-hate them. I seriously think it's being run by blind monkeys on downers. Lori Loughlin deserves better. Listen, Stamos is going to be available soon, now that ER is ending -- she and he need to figure out a way to recreate that old Uncle Jesse/Rebecca magic and save her from this toilet bowl.

She also deserved a little better than this dress:

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It's not... I mean, it could be worse. But unless she's planning to get married to a basketweaver after the show in a small ceremony officiated by one of the valets, I'd rather have seen her in something a bit less twee. And which didn't expose the fact that she forgot to loofah the Mystic Tan off her legs.

As for her show, I just have one word for The CW: Step the hell off Melrose Place unless you get someone there who knows how to pull crazy from thin air. I have serious, serious reservations that they will be able to recreate the mad genius of the time Kimberly Shaw Ripped Off Her Wig. Or when she tried to kill herself with pills just to lash out at Michael Mancini, but when he found her, he just smiled, turned on some classical music and poured a glass of wine. Or Kimberly's split personalities. Or that time Priscilla Presley almost gave Jack Wagner a lobotomy,Amanda Woodward incited her boss to hang himself over his desk, Sydney became a hooker, or Sydney joined a cult that counted Traci Lords as a member. Odds are, it will be more like the tedious first season of Melrose -- WILL BILLY QUIT DRIVING A CAB TO WORK AT HIS FATHER'S CARPET STORE??!?! -- and in that case, what's the point? Just rerun the original. Heather Locklear could use the cash. Hell, with the exception of Gay Matt, Kristin Davis, and maybe the resurrected Grant Show, they all could.

poll by twiigs.com
Permalink | Posted By Heather at 11:44 AM in Misc. Awards Shows
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January 8, 2009

People's Choice Press Room Fug: Kate Hudson

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You can not expect me to believe that this was the best option Kate Hudson had last night:

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For one thing, the skirt portion appears to be incredibly dirty. And I'm pretty sure she didn't get into a knockdown drag-out on the red carpet that spilled over into the gutter, so....color me perplexed. For another, this seems to be drifting dangerously close to looking like something from Dorothy Zbornak's evening wear line, to the point where I half expect to see that the next picture of her in the press room involves her biting her fist in front of a giant wedge of cheesecake. Looks like those of you who picked Kate in our Who Will Look Most Ridiculous At the People's Choice Awards pool have a good argument for taking home the prize (bragging rights, and half a tuna sandwich). Congrats!
Permalink | Posted By Jessica at 11:10 AM in Kate Hudson, Misc. Awards Shows
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January 8, 2009

People's Choice Award Fug or Fab: Debra Messing

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This is, I suspect, one of those dresses that the Fashion People (you know who you are -- hello there!) lose their nuts over, and the rest of us are kind of like, "but why is she wearing a hexagon?"

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That being said, after having stared at this dress for like half an hour as I sit here and stir my coffee -- question: can liquid Coffee Mate go bad? Because I am worried I've done something terrible to myself if it has. Just so you know -- it turns out I might dig this crazy geometry. Check it from the front:

Continue reading People's Choice Award Fug or Fab: Debra Messing.
Permalink | Posted By Jessica at 09:44 AM in Debra Messing, Fug or Fab, Misc. Awards Shows
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January 7, 2009

Sponsored Post: People's Choice Awards

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The People's Choice Awards ceremony airs tonight -- CAN YOU TELL? -- and they asked us to write a sponsored post for them about it today. This is that post. Any other coverage of the People's Choice Awards (for example, posts tomorrow in which we make fun of/praise outfits worn to said event) will be sponsored solely by our own crankiness. (And, let's be honest, Diet Coke, although we seem to be sponsoring THEM, and their sweet, fizzy, delicious chemical concoction.) We just wanted you to be aware. We will never include a sponsored post on this blog without disclosing that it is just that.

Now, of course, we know that if you are watching the People's Choice Awards, it is because you really, really need to know if America's Favorite New TV Comedy is Kath and Kim or Gary Unmarried, or that one starring that dude who was in those commercials about voice mail. But here at GFY HQ, it is because of our annual Who Will Look Most Ridiculous At The People's Choice Awards? Pool. Intern George has bested us twelve years in a row, despite the fact that he's only worked here for like three, most recently for accurately predicting that Sandra Oh would wear a HEPA Filter in 2007, and then for calling the fact that the writer's strike would jettison last year's show. So we thought you might want to get in on some of the hot betting action. The current front-runners in our pool are the following nominees (pictured wearing some of their past crimes for purely illustrative purposes):

KATY PERRY:

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RIHANNA:

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BRITNEY SPEARS:

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KEIRA KNIGHTLEY:

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KATE HUDSON: (How very interesting that she and Anne Hathaway are both nominated when they have a movie coming out this very weekend! Surely just a coincidence!)

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poll by twiigs.com


Thank you for voting, readers! And now, back to your regularly scheduled fuggery.

Permalink | Posted By Jessica at 09:20 AM in Misc. Awards Shows, Sponsored Post
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